Posted by Dinah on May 19, 2011, at 7:57:58
In reply to Close, posted by Annabelle Smith on May 19, 2011, at 5:42:24
What could happen?
Admittedly, it would be very embarrassing. I think I too would be careful about computer use and printed out emails. It's better to avoid embarrassment if possible.
But what would happen if she did find them? You are an adult. She can't control you any more than you could control your brother.
Are you maybe losing sight of the boundaries? You are you. Your family is your family. They can't engulf you if you don't let them. Step back, visualize the walls, recognize that you can't control your family any more than they can control you.
I'm not sure if you recognize how often you phrase your reactions in extremes? Maybe some reframing would help? Thinking in terms of this being very uncomfortable and something you'd rather avoid rather than something life shattering? Maybe think about what *would* happen if the worst you can imagine came about. And in concrete realistic terms. Because realistically speaking, what can she do other than cry and worry? If she cries and worries, how will that really effect your day to day life? You don't live at home.
It might be a good time to practice some DBT as well. Watch your feelings go by as leaves on a stream. They exist, you acknowledge them, and you observe them. You don't get swept away with them. Just watch them, acknowledge them. They are very uncomfortable aren't they? Where in your body do you feel them? Can you isolate the feelings in your body? I often find my reactions very interesting. It almost feels like an electrical charge running along my skin. How does yours feel? In concrete terms? What physical changes do you think are happening? Is your adrenaline rising?
And... you might want to avoid reading Sylvia Plath.
poster:Dinah
thread:985601
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20110511/msgs/985696.html